Friday, April 30, 2010

Whoa, we were off the wall, we were mirrors of eachother, pasisng by...

Before Facebook Fanpages (Or things you "like"...ugh, what is that?) usurped my profile information, I had "rescuing earthworms from the sidewalk" as one of my interests (Okay, I hadn't "liked" helping worms on the sidewalk yet, but I just did). In the Spring months, I've mentally added caterpillars to that list. I've just seen so many of them struggling to get back to the grass (I just helped an injured one, but probably just made things worse when he fell a few feet off the leaf back to the sidewalk...actually, maybe he wasn't even hurt, just staying still to avoid being eaten, and maybe i was the one that hurt him...I remember multiple times in my life where I've begged someone not to kill a bug that's been in the house, and then managed to decapitate it in the process of getting it in a cup and and slipping a sheet of paper underneath. At least my intentions were good?)

Anyways, I guess I feel an obligation to any cute, innocent little animal, insects included, to help them, especially since I've seen so many squished caterpillars, with their light green innards spilling out of their heads (Sorry for that image). I suppose I'm trying to use my privilege as a human to do good. I mean, why am I here as a person when another living being is a little spiky wormy thing that's going to get stepped on or biked over or eaten by a bird? Why are that wormy thing's siblings going to get the chance to be beautiful butterflies who live free and exiting (albeit short) lives? I'm guessing it isn't Karma, at least not in their current lives, since I don't really think caterpillars have the capacity to do bad (they might sting someone with those poison spiky thingers or eat too much of a tree so another caterpillar can't get to it, but those are mere survival techniques, not exerting power for the sake of exerting power). Maybe the caterpillars that never grow up to be butterflies (or...moths) are ones that did something bad in a previous life as a human or dolphin or something, but how do you explain how one gets to be a butterfly? It's not a bad life, but not an exceptionally good one, either. Maybe that's why there are so many insects in the world; because most people are not exceptionally good or evil, so they get to live secure, but not necessarily fulfilling next lives (I mean, you'd grow up without a family, make babies, and then die without getting to see them grow).

(I don't even know I believe in reincarnation; I don't know why I wrote all of that)

(This is what happens when I walk to and from class after losing my iPod...I think of weird, stream-of-conscious stuff)

(You're probably all like, "This entry would have been much easier to account for 10 days ago than it is today, under certain assumptions". [Though you probably don't really think/talk like that, even if I do] But I swear that isn't the case, and I have yet to reach for a cookie)

(Remember a few entries ago when I expressed concern for being driven totally up a wall? I think it's happening...)

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